IBINTU 8 ABANTU BABANA BAKUNDANA BAKORA MBERE YO KURYAMA

Urukundo, kubana. Nta kintu kiryoha mu buzima nko kubona umugabo n’umugore babana bakundanye, kandi bakanabigaragarizanya. Urukundo ruruhirwa, rukanabagarirwa.

Kimwe mu bihe byiza kurusha ibindi cyo kuhira urukundo hagati y’abashakanye, ni mbere yo kuryama buri munsi. Ni yo mpamvu ngiye kukubwira ibi bintu 8 abashakanye babana neza, cyangwa bakunda bakabigaragarizanya, bakora mbere yo kuryama.

Niba ibi bintu mutabikoraga, nimugeragezemo ibyo mwumva bitabagoye, cyangwa bitababangamiye, kandi mubigire akamenyero.

1. Kuzimya telefoni, cyangwa kuyishyira muri bucece (silent or flight mode), ubundi ukayishyira kure. Muri make, kujya ku mbuga nkoranyambaga biba bihagaze, ntibyongere kugutwara, umwanya wawe wose n’ubwenge bwawe bwose, ahubwo ukabiharira uwo mwashakanye. Nibura, 21h00 wakagombye kuba umaze kuzimya telefoni no kuyishyira ku ruhande, ubuzima busigaye ukabuharira urugo rwawe.
2. Gushyira akazi ku ruhande. Kukibagirwa! Wikomeza gukora akazi, kureba ama e-mails, n’ibindi, kuko, ntibituma gusa uha umwanya uwo mwashakanye, ahubwo binatuma ubona imbaraga zihagije zo gukora akazi neza ku munsi ukurikira. Irinde kuvuga ibijyanye n’ibiguhangayikishije mu kazi, ibibazo by’amafaranga, n’ibindi bishobora gutuma uwo mwashakanye na we atangira guhangayika, kuko icyo gihe bituma ubushake mwari mufite bwo gutera akabariro bugenda.
3. Kugira mu buriri icyarimwe. Ubushakashatsi bwerekana ko abashakanye bagera kuri 75% batirirwana, kandi na ninjoro ntibagire mu buriri icyarimwe, kandi ibi bakabikora batyo buri munsi. Zimwe mu mpamvu zituma abashakanye bataryamira rimwe, hari igihe usanga umwe agifite iby’akazi ari gukorera mu rugo, cyangwa afite ibintu bimushishikaje arimo kurebera kuri televiziyo, cyangwa se ari kuri murandasi (internet). N’ubwo bwose izi mpamvu zisa n’aho zifatika, ariko abahanga mu by’ubuzima bwo mu mutwe bagaragaza ko atari byiza habe na mba. Iyo muryamira rimwe, bituma mukomeza kumva muri kumwe, mwegeranye, mushakana, kandi igikorwa cy’abashakanye mukabasha kugikora buri wese agifitiye ubushake, atari bya bindi byo kugikora ari uko umwe akuye undi mu bitotsi.
4. Kuganira mbere yo kuryama. Abashakanye bitanaho, babanza kumenya niba bombi nta kibazo bafite. Uwaba yagaragaje imyitwarire idasanzwe (kubabazwa cyangwa gushimishwa n’ikintu runaka) bakabanza bakabiganiraho mbere yo gusinzira. Ibi bituma buri umwe yiyumva mu wundi, buri umwe akanezezwa n’uko undi amwitaho, bityo ubwonko bukavubura ya misemburo y’ibyishimo ndetse n’iy’urukundo, imirunga y’urukundo rwanyu igakomeza gukomera. Nta kiza rero kibaho nko gusinzira wishimye, unezerewe.
5. Kutagira intonganya cyangwa impaka za ngo turwane mbere yo gusinzira. Iyo muryamye murakaranyije, ubushakashatsi bugaragaza ko bidatera akababaro gusa kuri buri umwe, ahubwo binatuma aramuka afite stress, yumva ataruhutse neza, ku buryo uwo munsi ukurikira wirirwa wakubereye mubi, akazi ntugakore neza.
6. Kutararana umwana. Byakabaye byiza uburiri bubaye ubwanyu mwembi, mugakora ibyo mushaka byose nta mwana mwikanga. Yego ni byo ushobora kuzana umwana mu cyumba nko mu gihe yarose nabi, ugira ngo atuze adakomeza kugira ubwoba, ariko ntibyakabaye ibihoraho. Ikindi, ubushakashatsi bwerekana ko kurarana n’abana bituma umuntu adasinzira neza. Uba umeze nk’uryamiye amajanja. Guhora usinzira nk’uryamiye amajanja buri munsi rero, na byo ni bibi cyane, bishobora kukugiraho ingaruka zo kubona usa n’uhorana umunaniro kandi uzi ko udakora cyane bikakuyobera. Ushobora kwibaza uti: "ese niba akabebe kacu kakiri gato twakaraza konyine?". Ibyo birumvikana, ariko mu gihe umwana atangiye gukura, ni byiza kumumenyereza kumuha uburiri bwe. Ushobora kubitangira umwana akiri muto, ku mezi make cyane, ariko burya iyo agize umwaka aba atangiye gukura. Ku myaka ibiri, umwana yakagombye kuba yararangije kuva mu cyumba cy’ababyeyi. Kuko, uretse kuba namwe ubwanyu bibagiraho ingaruka, n’umwana ubwe bimugiraho ingaruka, kuko hari ibyo mushobora kwibwira ko mukora yasinziriye, nyamara aba abumva yisinzirije, bityo akaba yazagaragaza ibimenyetso bimeze nk’iby’umwana ureba pornographie cyangwa se umwana wafashwe ku ngufu, n’ibindi.
7. Gukorerana massage, cyangwa gusigana amavuta. Ni byo, ushobora kuba utazi gukora massage, ariko mu gihe mumaze kwiyuhagira ninjoro, byaba byiza cyane buri umwe asize undi amavuta, kandi mwitonze, nta huti huti, ukamusiga buri gice cy’umubiri neza. Kubigenza gutya bigabanya umunaniro, bikagabanya ibintu byose biguhangayikishije mu mutwe, kandi bigatuma murushaho kwegerana no kumva koko mushakana. Ibi, biba byiza haba ku wabikorewe, ndetse no ku wabikoreye mugenzi we, igihe yabikoze abishaka.
8. Guhoberana no gusomana. Ibi na byo ni bimwe mu byiza abashakanye bakundana bakora mbere yo kujya muburiri, kandi bikabagirira akamaro. Ushobora kuvuga uti ibi bikorwa n’abashakanye badafitanye ibibazo. Ariko reka nkubwire ko ubushakashatsi bwerekana ko, n’abafitanye ibibazo, iyo hagize ubasha gutera intambwe yo guhobera mugenzi we buri gihe mbere yo kuryama, n’aho batabiganira, umutima mwiza ugenda ugaruka ibibazo bikagenda biyoyoka.

Video: https://youtu.be/VIC5fWCwgAA